The sun was setting on the Venice Beach Walkway. Two stories above, I passed my friend a refill of her Mimo and jumped back into the hot tub. In the tower next to us, a bunga bunga party was in full effect. The extremely dapper, gray-bearded European birthday boy insisted I come over and meet his sexy friends. I was certain one of them was Tori Black. I thanked him but couldn’t. This would be my last night and I was busy with my own UN operations over on this 60-yard deck.
I slipped back into the tub and looked to my West Coast Bella. She flipped her long hair back, And it caught the rays of the crimson sun and Malibu hills in the distance. She raised her glass and we toasted. A perfect memory, for long to come, she said, “How can you leave all this?” I took a long moment, conflicted, but regained my composure. I leaned on Biggie for this one, “If I got to choose a coast, I got to choose the East.”
All things, good or bad, come to an end, and this unintentional LA reprieve had run its course. I said my goodbyes to my new and old friends and made my peace with the Peaceful Ocean. Destiny and adventure laid ahead.
The Plan
MY TIMING IS PERFECT.
My high school crush was into me in my senior summer. I made the move above a fresh cemetery grave. SHE WAS NOT EMO.
I have the most perfect timing in the whole of The Universe.
I signed a two-year rental lease in NYC a day before I lost my job. YOU TRY TELLING A RUSSIAN YOU ARE BACKING OUT OF A LEASE.
It is an innate power, gifted to me by the gods. It makes sense that I started my return trip right into a pandemic, protests and riots.
Again, it’s all my fault, I unleashed The Ultimate Mush on the US (see here for that full story). He’s the one who caused a global pandemic, shut down both my bank account and closed casinos worldwide. Now, I had been in LA for about three months. My budget was in terrible shape and I had to stop throwing money into the wind.
This return trip was pretty much the same as originally planned: Head north, see some northern things, and gamble. Except that last part was going to be a little difficult to execute. Everything was mega screwed up by The Great Wyoming Valley Mush, so I’d have to tweak things a bit.
I planned to hit casinos in extremely low population densities, visit lots more parks and, unfortunately, skip restaurants and bars. That was a big bummer. You really can’t get to know a town until you can see people in their social elements. There’s was nothing to be done, though.
I decided to go as far north until I didn’t feel like going north any more, then head East until I hit Yellowstone. After that, I’d play it by ear. All that was left was to pack up the car and go.
